RAF anti-UFO patrols above crystal 'Skull of Doom' exhibition

Edinburgh, Scotland - (X-Files Mess): It has been dubbed the 'Skull of Doom' following a spooky Inca prediction that it would curse any daftass Hollywood movie that used it to resurrect the flaccid acting career of Harrison Ford.

And now the RAF is to guard the skies above Edinburgh's Hysteries and Mysteries conference which is exhibiting the pre-Atlantean Mitchell-Hedges crystal skull.

Three Typhoon jets have been scrambled on MoD orders after repeated sightings of an 'ominous mothership' attempting to spirit away the 5,000 year-old crystal artefact by tractor beam.

The magnificent quartz skull was originally discovered inside an alien UFO hangar in Lubaantun, Belize.

The archaeologists who claimed to have found the crystal object initially said it was hidden beside a collapsed Inca temple altar 'to avoid ridicule about any potential UFO hangar nonsense'.

Some believe the skull hails originally from the Cydonia region of Mars which NASA's Orbiter is currently excavating in the hope of unearthing a further eleven other 'sister' skulls, including the fabled fifty tonne Amethyst Giant.

Anna Mitchell Hedges was a raving loony.